Bailey Beagle Wisdom

I may look, act, and feel like a dog, but at least I'm having fun in the process.

I can tell that you are lying, your lips are moving.

The little I know I owe to my ignorance.

Consciousness is that annoying thing between naps.

I'm worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.

No matter how smart you are, you spend much of your day being an idiot.

We all love animals, but why do we call some "pets" and some "dinner"?

We all love animals, but why do we call some "pets" and some "dinner"?

Nobody can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it

How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?

When angry, count to four; when very angry, bark.

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.

The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue

Never bark with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.

I don't mind you talking so much, as long as you don't mind me not listening.

Speak softly and own a big, mean Doberman.

I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

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